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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Greatest trick or bad plan? 

Some have enquired why I haven't been blogging recently. For one thing living outside of time it is hard to maintain a blog in a world constrained by time. I also don't like to do light blogging notices. Frankly I hate the word light! Dark blogging ahead is much better and I will try to keep up some dark blogging. The fact that it has almost been a year since I last posted is no big deal. One day is like a thousand years so you should be happy that I don't post daily and in fact post much more often.

Some have said that "The greatest trick the devil ever pulled on the world was convincing us he didn't exist." Or really that none of us demons ever existed. Though I am not quite so sure about the prudence of this strategy. Sure it does make it easier for us to get our job done at times. Yet it can also be quite annoying to be ignored. We didn't exactly deny god because we are a humble lot. Pride goeth before the fall and even after we fell. I never did understand why Jesus said "I saw Satan fall like lightning from the sky." I mean the dude see's everything anyway and what is so bad about lightning after all." If usually gives a nice ozone smell like something burning which we have got quite use to over the years.

The reason I decided to pop in was that I became aware of an article on a new book about my boss.

Henry Ansgar Kelly says Satan is the most maligned figure in history and has endured 17 centuries of unjustified character assassination.

"For 1700 years Satan has been the enemy of God, whereas in the Bible he works for God, he's his prime minister or attorney-general, in charge of policing the world," Professor Kelly said.

"He is one of God's angels, and his job is to test people."

The 71-year-old University of California professor has played devil's advocate for four decades, and is the author of many books and scholarly articles.

The devil did not have a kingdom, did not rule over hell, and did not try to damn people, Professor Kelly said. These ideas had developed from the second to the fourth centuries AD, and were refined for the next 1000 years. Professor Kelly said it was important to recapture the biblical understanding of Satan to combat the doctrine of original sin, "in which the whole human race is delivered to Satan".

...Satan's rare appearances in the Old Testament were not by one person, but a number of angels doing God's work, Professor Kelly said. He would like his theories to attract more official hostility, he said, because then they would be better known.

..."Demons are like talking germs - parasites looking for a place to stay, like diseases - and are under Satan's control," he said. "I prefer to have a global exorcism [of Satan's reputation]. Then we wouldn't have to worry about these minor manifestations." [Source]

I just don't know where to start. Talking germs? You have got to be kidding. I mean I have a pretty thick hide and have been called lots of names, but talking germs? We are angels with mighty intellects not some mindless organism that can be killed with an antibiotic. Articles and books like this make me think that the "devils don't exist" policy can lead to silliness like this. I am tempted to pop in the professor one day and then let him call me a talking germ to my face.

What really annoys me and many of my demon cohorts is this idea that we are lending god a hand. Be serious, we do all we can to thwart him. We want to help humans to realize that they shouldn't be humble or followers, but should strike out on their own and increase the population down here. I love the fact that that people promoting population control up there are helping to increase our population down here - though unfortunately all those babies get scooped up by god. At least we get many of the proponents. Getting back to the subject we are not god's helpers but his enemy who god should have listened to in the first place. We have to work really hard since god keeps making good out of evil. We are just hoping that one day we can change the tide in our direction. Sure we have been duped at times in doing god's work for him - but we certainly never planned it that way. We do not go around testing people like we are quality assurance representatives or inspectors placing tags with our number on it in your shirt pocket. What testing we do we hope for failure. In fact we are so good at failure that our rates are almost as high as public schools!

I think we need a new strategy of making people aware of our presence once again. Many people don't know that they can easily defeat us with the help of god and we could make many fear and tremble at our apparent power and to constantly worry about us. Much better that we be getting props once again for our work instead of being ignored or mocked by former Jesuits.

By the way I though I might give a shout out to my boss Satan who finally got around to blogging himself. I joke with him that I started blogging before he did, but the reminds me that he is mentioned in the bible way before Israelites started sacrificing their children before me. Being that he is the father of lies you can't trust much of what he writes. Just consider him a normal part of the mainstream media.

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